Cause there was a billion fucking chickens on the other side.
A nervous wreck.
I don’t even!
Getting from here to someplace else is instantaneous, but what happens in between is incomprehensible. (source: am autistic)
A vegetarian looked at my burger and said, “You know, a cow died so you could have that burger.” Mid-bite, I looked at his salad and responded, “Maybe he died because you keep eating all its fucking food!”
…than the men who mention it.
About 50 pounds.
First he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there’s a huge flower line…
Three wisemen die and go to heaven for their good deeds. When they arrived at the gates, an Angel greets them and explains the rules, “Under no circumstances are you to step on a duck”. And throwing the gates open…
Because he was… shellfish. hahahaha