Me: “That will be 17.50, please.” Customer: “Are you a Christian, dear?” Me: “Why do you ask?” Customer: “Are you?” Me: “Well, no. Why do you want to know?” Customer: “Oh. I would like to be helped by someone else,…

So I asked a religious truck driver what his CB handle is. His answer: “My handle’s ‘Messiah’.” (Get it? Sounds like “Handel’s Messiah.”)

Little Katie was at Sunday school one day. The teacher asked the class “Who is someone in your life that worships God by always speaking His name?” Little Katie raised her hand and said “The fifth grade teacher at my…

Billy was walking in a shopping center with his mom, and suddenly she stopped to pick up a penny. When she reached out for it, he saw armpit hair. Frightened, he said, “You’re not my mom! I’m calling the police.”…

Mik:Darn it! There’s only 2 chips in my bowl.Damn you,chips! Mak: Aargh! you made me so angry I am gonna punch them! Mak punches the chips. Mik: WHOAH! you made 2 big chips into 20 small ones! Mak: I AM…

god told moses to come forth but he tripped on a banana peel and came fifth

A man, trying to understand the nature of God, asked Him, “God, how long is a million years to you?” God answered, “A million years is like a minute.” Then the man asked, “God, how much is a million dollars…

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee. The first Catholic man tells his friends, “My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him ‘Father’.” The second Catholic man chirps, “My son is…

Man- “Jesus Christ! I can’t open this hard drive.” Jesus- “Use the torx, Luke.”

God said “Let there be light.” Chuck Norris said “Say please.”