Deep Thoughts

Star Wars vs Titanic

10. Titanic top speed woefully shy of light speed.

9. Leia is a princess, a senator, and a freedom fighter. Rose is

8. “…using an old Jedi mind trick” much more interesting way to get
what you want than saying “Please, I have a child.”

7. Titanic is egalitarian by portraying poor people as sympathetic
characters. Star Wars is egalitarian by promoting bug-eyed amphibians
to Admiral.

6. Darth Vader wears black body armor and blows up planets for fun.
Cal wears snappy tuxedo and is rude to the poor.

5. Everyone knew the boat was going to sink, but nobody anticipated,
“Luke… I am your father.”

4. There are always enough escape pods in Star Wars.

3. If Luke were handcuffed to a pipe below decks in a sinking ship, he
could use the Force to get the key.

2. Han Solo would’ve steered clear of that stinkin’ iceberg!

1. Sure, Leo can dance, but can he bull’s-eye Womp Rats in his T16
back home?

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